04/26/2018










When Your Elderly Parents Live With You

Senior Care Assistant Reading BookThe decision to move an elderly parent into your home can be a difficult one, both emotionally and financially. However, a consultation with an elder care attorney may put your mind at ease about many of the uncertainties. Having an elderly parent live with you comes with additional expenses, but you don’t have to feel like you’re drowning in a financial abyss. There is help available; you just need to know where to look for it.

In many cases, a child assumes responsibility for most of the parents’ expenses. Sometimes, siblings offer financial assistance at the beginning, but over time, the expenses become the sole responsibility of the child providing housing – out of sight out of mind.

This common situation can be more than financially draining. Fighting with siblings over the shared burden of financial responsibility can destroy those relationships and cause resentment toward the elderly parent. In order to avoid these unnecessary family disputes, it is essential to have a comprehensive, detailed plan in place prior to making any decisions. There are many resources available to ease the financial, physical, and emotional burden of having an elderly parent live with you. It can be an enjoyable experience for all if you plan correctly and know where to turn for help when problems arise.

Easing the Financial Burden

Can my parent still qualify for Medicaid? This is an important question. In New York and other states, a child is not legally obligated to pay for the elderly parent’s care. If your parent is living with you, there is a good chance that he or she qualifies for Medicaid. In fact, programs such as Community Medicaid and Medicaid Home Care provide additional benefits for a parent living in his or her child’s home. Medicaid programs are just one example of the many resources available to you if your parent lives in your home. An elder care lawyer can help you understand your options, save you money, and help protect the delicate relationships with your parent and siblings.

Questions to Ask Before Moving An Elderly Parent Into Your Home:

  • What kind of care does my parent need?
  • How much assistance can I provide?
  • Do we get along well?
  • Will my parent contribute financially?
  • Is my home adult-friendly?
  • Are my spouse and kids supportive of this decision?
  • Will my parent have an available social network?
  • What kind of help can I expect from my siblings?
  • What will I do and how will I feel if my siblings are unable to provide assistance?

This is not an exhaustive list by any means, but it provides a good starting point for discussion. While not all of these questions may be easy to answer (and some might not have the answer you want), they provide a more holistic view of how successful the arrangement might be. Involve your siblings in this conversation as well. Early planning doesn’t guarantee success, but it increases the chances.

Call the Law Offices of Andrew M. Lamkin P.C.

As elder care lawyers, we talk quite a bit about quality of life for elders, but it’s just as important for you to maintain your quality of life. Moving a parent into your home is a beautiful, loving gesture. However, this selfless gesture can come with added expenses and a long list of stressors. A skilled elder care attorney can help you before, during, and after you have made this very important decision. Call the Law Offices of Andrew M. Lamkin for a free consultation today.



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